I never thought I
would know exactly how my life would unravel, but I think that I would have to
say I am so thankful it is going the way it is going. I didn’t think I would be
sitting on the southern coast of Spain writing a blog nor did I think I would
ever leave it.
Well as all things,
this too is comes to an end. The past 8 or 9 months, I mean really who is truly
counting I’m too busy trying to overwhelm myself in the immensity of it all. I
still don’t think it all has sunken in. I have learned to love myself in a new
way, cried at the things that really pull my heart strings, opened my heart to
friendships I never would have come by before this, learned different things
about myself and how to handle things, but most importantly, I have laughed joyfully.
I could not be happier with myself, how
gracious the Lord is with me, the opportunities I have been given, the
relationships I have made and kept, and the chance to truly grow into a better
person.
With that being said,
Spain is somewhere where I grew-mentally, spiritually, and emotionally. The
first time and the second time, and I hope the next time I come back (which God
willing will be within the next year for a nice vacation). It has been and will
always be held in a special place in my heart, which is how it makes it a little easier for me to say
adios for a little while…
I made a “big girl”
decision last week all by myself. I was offered a Special Education teacher
position at an elementary school in Texas. It just so happened to be the same
school I student taught at and in the same city of my university. There is
history and this history is good. I was also talking with another school in
Houston, which is the city I grew up by and the city where my family still
lives. And to top it off, I was accepted
to Andalucia (southern Spain) once more.
So, you could say I had some praying to do.
I had 2 interviews 2
weeks ago, for 2 different schools and in 2 different cities. I received a call
back 2 days after my Monday interview.
Since I am in Spain, I could not be in my parent’s house to answer the
call. So I called back not really knowing what to expect and fearing an offer
would come up. I feared it, because I then knew I would be making a decision
sooner than I had anticipated. The insecurities were setting in “I’m not old enough
to have a real job”, “What am I going to say if they offer me a job?”, “Am I
ready?”, “I havent gotten a peace from God…will I know when they say those
words “We would like to recommend you for a position..”, etc. I just let
everything sink in, and I just continued to hold out for my peace in something.
A something I knew would be “right” for me, for my family, and for my career as
a Special Education teacher.
Well, it wasn’t a
fairy tale story, because lets face it. This is real life. I had called back
maybe 4 times via skype trying to get a hold of my HR guy. I think its
difficult with the time differences and our busy schedules, but finally we set
up an appointment and I had those words said to me “we would like to recommend you
for a position” and I was in shock. Not
shock that I froze and could not say a word, I was in “big girl” shock mode. I
didn’t even know I had that in me! Haha I asked for time to think about the
offer, and I received 24 hours.
At the time, it felt
like those single 24 hours were the “end all be all” of my life. I took the
time to talk to people in my life who I valued intently for their advice and
most importantly their prayers. What I
wanted more than anything was to make sure this was what God wanted. I trust
that He has, is, and will continue to lead my life in a wonderful direction. So,
I continued to think and pray. I took some time on my terrace overlooking my
breathtaking view of the ocean and mountains as the sun was going down. I read
my Word and journaled. As I look back at my journal entry, I see what I see myself
doing and failing everytime. I was trying to control my decision for selfish
reasons, and I put a wall up and was scared to hear what the Lord was telling
me. Well after the Lord shows you an amazing pink/purple sky (which is my
favorite…best ones are in Lubbock, Texas hands down), I let Him in. I read the
next chapter in my devotional about humbling your heart and letting Him be in control of my life,
which led me to a great scripture in 2 Kings about a man who learned to humble
his heart and he accepted the Lord into his life. The last verse said “Go in
peace” as the man left the healer.
It hit me at that
moment. This was good. This was God. And this is right for me, my family, and
my career as a teacher. So, I said yes to God.
I didn’t say yes to
anyone yet at that point, not even my daddy who I talked to before I went to
bed. I’m not going to lie he did try to influence a US job over an overseas job
a little bit, but he didn’t know what I was doing either at that point. I would
have loved to talk to my mom, but she was at work when I called. So, it was
harder but maybe it was the way it was suppose to be. I learned that I can make
an important decision on my own with the Lord’s guidance, and that was the
sweetest joy.
So, I said yes to the
job. I will be a Special Education teacher for Lubbock ISD for the upcoming
school year of 2012-2013.
People have asked
questions like, “are you happy with that decision?” “are you sure you will
still be at peace with it when you know your city in Spain?” “are you going to
regret it?”
And I have told them…Yes,
I’m happy. I have been lucky enough to live in Spain twice, not just once, and
who gets to say that. Not many! And I won’t regret it, because there is nothing
to regret. My passion for life is serving children with special needs. I’m
ready to do that full force.
But there is something
that won’t change and probably will never change….I will always travel. I am
already brainstorming a Europe trip next summer!! You may think I’m crazy, but
you only get one life, just one, so live it BIG and never stop doing what you
truly love and makes you utterly happy.
